A Cleveland Mother Needs Our Help

This is a request for financial support.

On the morning of April 17, 1978, I went to court to request that the custody of my two minor children, Paul and Ben, be given to me, to finalize my divorce, and make a property settlement. My ability to mother was being questioned by their father because of my lifestyle and my involvement with "so-called liberated women" and feminist organizations.

Nearly two years ago, when I left my marriage, my choice was to take Paul and Ben with me. It soon became clear that I would have to fight for their custody in court. Having no means of support, I left my children in Parma with their father, who I expected would care and provide for them. During this time I engaged in the task of supporting and tak. ing care of myself so that I would be equipped financially and emotionally to provide for them, whether they lived with their father or with me. I have maintained continuous contact with them, and we still have a very close relationship.

Their father spends little time with them, is ignorant of their physical and emotional needs, and has threatened to interfere with the time Paul, Ben and I spend together. That, in addition to con. cerns they have shared with me, their growing reluctance to return to Parma, and my own desire to have them live with me, has motivated me to fight for custody.

I have already received a great deal of support and encouragement from the feminist community and from my lawyer and friends. Without that support, what is ahead would be much harder.

The court has heard evidence, but has not yet decided whether to award custody to me. Even if it decides in my favor, the April 17 hearing may have been only a preliminary skirmish.

Court costs are high. The concern and personal interest of my lawyer have defrayed some of the costs. However, court costs remain. I am request. ing financial as well as emotional support in order to pursue my fight for custody.

The American Psychological Association has adopted a policy that a parent's sexual orientation "should not be the sole or primary variable cons!dered" in disputes over child custody, and yet, in the State of Ohio, not one lesbian mother has been given custody of her children as a result of a court decision. (One case in southern Ohio was settled out of court in favor of the mother.) This is true in most of our fifty states. I would like my efforts to change that fact.

Bunnyss

Gold Flower: Defense for Battered Women

A group calling itself the Gold Flower Defense Committee is currently forming to help support three Cleveland women who have been charged with murder for defending themselves against violent, attacks. The three women, none of whom know each other, are Kathy Thomas, Tahira Wadud, and Barbara Hanzel.

Thomas, who was severely beaten by her common law husband, is scheduled for trial before Judge J. P. Kilbane (623-8756) on June 1. The trial had previously been set for April 10, but her attorneys were able to get a continuance since they had been given only four days' notice.

Wadud, who was raped and beaten by the man she is charged with killing, was offered a plea of negligent homicide at a recent plea bargaining session. If she pleads guilty to the offense, a first degree misdemeanor, she will probably be sentenced to at least six months in the County Workhouse. At this writing, no decision has been made. The judge assigned to Wadud's case is Judge Sam Zingale (623-8745).·

Barbara Hanzel was also severely beaten by her husband. At this time she has been declared incompetent to stand trial because she is an epileptic, and has been sent from jail to Metropolitan General Hospital for observation. She will then return to court for a new hearing before Judge Burt Griffin (623-8736) to determine her competency. Her -attorney expects she will be held competent.

Information about the status of the cases can be had by calling the respective judges at the numbers given above, and providing the bailiff with the defendant's name.

The Gold Flower Defense Committee, which derives its name from the story of the way that

violence against women was ended in China, has invited Yvonne Wanrow to come to Cleveland to draw attention and support to the dilemma of these three women. Wanrow will moderate a Speakout. for women who have defended themselves against a violent attack of any kind which will be held on Saturday, May 20, at 1:30 p.m. in the Kiva Room, Cleveland State University. A lawyer will also be present to discuss the legal aspects of self-defense. Anyone who would like to share their experience on that day, please call Jeanne Van Atta at 391-3912. Yvonne Wanrow will also speak at a public rally to be held Friday, May 19.

On Sunday, May 21, Lynn Rosewater, 2821 Kersdale Road, Pepper Pike, will host a wine and cheese reception for Wanrow. Tickets will be $10, $25, $50 and $100. The proceeds will go 'to the Gold Flower Committee and to Women Together (the shelter house for battered,women).

Anyone who would like to join the Defense Com. mittee can do so by agreeing with the purpose of the committee and either paying a membership fee or offering in-kind services to the group. The purpose of the committee is: "To affirm women's right to defend themselves against violent attack by provid. ing financial, political, personal, community and legal support.' There are five areas in which the committee needs help: membership, finances, education and outreach, political strategy and legal. If anyone can help the committee with any of these areas, please call:

Mary Jo Ginty Jeanne Van Atta Jane Campbell

631-3556 391-3912 696-3100

Please send your donations to:

Judith Gregory c/o EmPress, Inc. P.O. Box 18208

Cleveland Heights, Ohio, 44118

All money received above my expenses will be used in the future by women facing similar encounters with the justice system. There are efforts now starting in the Greater Cleveland area to form Lesbian Defense Fund. Additional information con cerning lesbians who are fighting or will be fighting for the custody of their children can be obtained by writing to:

Lesbian Defense Fund (LDF) P. O. Box 4

Essex Junction, Vermont 05452 (802) 862-9046

CALM

1425 Walnut Street Philadephia, Pa. 19102 (215) 603-3055

I would especially like to thank What She Wants, Oven Productions, The Women's Power Circle, Blg Mama Poetry Troupe and Coven, the women of EmPress and all the women and organizations who are supporting EmPress (which is supporting me), and the many individual women and organizations who have offered me incredible emotional support. When the rubber meets the road (so to speak), we really are a very caring and supportive community.

Judy Gregory

Editor's Note: A pre-trial was held at the April 17th court date and the trial date was rescheduled for May 9th.

Lesbian Mothers

In the eyes of the law, the well-being of the parents is, generally not a consideration in custody battles. A woman without Independent earnings cannot afford to leave home with her children, so she leaves without them. This is a typical situation. She wants a divorce. Her husband is the breadwinner and says no. She needs a few.weeks alone to think. While she is gone, he files for divorce and obtains temporary custody of the kids. To pre. serve her sanity, she has seriously Impaired her chance of custody. If you want to keep your kids. whatever you do, don't leave home without your children.

Lesbian mothers who want visitation rights or custody are routinely forced to answer two charges: that their sexuality is contagious, and that the "stigma" of their lifestyle will hurt their offspring.

Lesbians are one of several kinds of "secondrate" parents who do not adhere to the traditional nuclear family pattern.

A Boston study on 21 children of 18 lesbian mothers revealed that: Children generally found the break-up of their parents' marriages more upsetting than their mothers' homosexuality; communica tion and emotional difficulties existed before the marital breakup, so that when the mother revealed she was gay, it did not create a problem but explained an existing emotional situation. Most children attempted to accept the mothers' gayness emotionally, but without the necessary support to help them cope with early feelings of hurt, anger and. humiliation; younger children (9-13) experienced idolation and differentness from their peers, making acceptance of their mothers' homosexuality more difficult; older children (13-26) were more concerned

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